The Bristol Poonami
As 18,000 dogs attend Crufts 2025 in Birmingham this weekend, I thought it would be a good time to talk about "poo in Bristol". There have been 370 "poo" reports in Bristol made on FixMyStreet since 2020 and it seems that 2025 is shaping up to be a "pootastic" year with 56 reports already made in 2025, which is almost four times the rate of "poo reports" for 2024.
The Ward with the highest total of "poo reports" is "Hengrove and Whitchurch Park" with 43, with the lowest being "Redland" with only 1 report in 5 years.
An interesting point to note that these "poo reports" are not just related to dog mess. Of the 56 reports made so far in 2025: 39 are for "dog poo", 14 are for "human faeces", 1 is for "bird poo" and 2 are not categorised. I believe that most dog poo incidents are not reported, but people are much more likely to report human poo incidents. So this analysis should not be taken as evidence that human street poo's are anywhere near as prolific as dog street poo's. Here is a sample of some of the recent poo reports:
07/03/2025 "On the pavement outside no.43 , looks to be human faeces"
07/03/2025 "I reported this issue yesterday and it's been reported as fixed, but it's not. There may have been some confusion as there were two different piles to be cleared up - one opposite Trym View Hall, which is gone; one on the pavement next to 162 Southmead Road, which is still there."
06/03/2025 "There is a large human faeces on the middle of the pavement with some toilet roll. It has been covered with a leaflet."
On the plus side this could be considered free advertising for Boardwalk Estate Agents: "Our passion for Bristol homes extends beyond the properties that we sell. Every day, we discover new people and places that make Bristol the place we love to live."
05/03/2025 "There is a giant poo on the pavement. It is absolutely disgusting. Please can it be cleaned up? Afraid to go near it for fear of disease."
05/03/2025 "Human faeces found outside house. Owners of house directing people around it."
28/02/2025 "A Human excrement or vomit problem has been found by Bristol City Council. Stanley Street, Lawrence Hill. Below the fire escape steps to the rear of the Leisure Centre is human waste. This is a well used thoroughfare and is close to the entrance to the primary school. This presents a health risk, could this please be removed. Thank you."
Her are some suggestions for dealing with the Bristol Poonami:
Composting
"Bristol Green councillors have called for “human composting” for dead people to be legalised to reduce carbon emissions from cremations." 03/03/2025
Please note that this idea was first suggested by John Langley.
As a first step, why not set up a Composting service for Bristol Poo? This idea has already been implemented in Ithica (USA) where in 18 months, a company composted about 12 tons of dog waste from the park that would otherwise have been sent to landfill or left to pollute the environment. The end result was two truckloads of compost.
The human faeces could be used to fertilise our park in Bristol.
An unfortunate downside to using biosolids in soil is the smell that comes with it - winds can carry the foul smell into towns, and it can linger for a few days. - Why are farmers using human poo fertiliser?
There is an untapped fertilizer resource in human excreta. In Africa, for example, the theoretical quantities of nutrients that can be recovered from human excreta are comparable with all current fertilizer use on the continent. Wikipedia
DNA Testing
In the USA DNA testing is used to identify the dog owners who don't pick up their poo. Perhaps Bristol could set up a Dog Poo Exclusion Zone, where all dog owners were required to register the DNA of their pooches so that any pavement poopers could be tracked down and fined as a deterrent. It could be know as "The PEZ".
For the human poo, the Council could collect samples and check it against the National DNA Database.
Poo Pickers
We already have groups of civic minded people like the "Friends of the Avon New Cut" who clear areas of rubbish. (Thank you for your service).
Perhaps local dog owners could come together and set up "Dog Poo Fairy" groups who clean up dog poo left by the small minority of dog owners who give them all a bad name.
Useful Links
Bristol Council - Reporting a dog mess problem
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